When life gives you a chance of relationship, sometimes, saying no is a better way of saving yourself and not hurting somebody else. By doing that, you create a gap which will define your choices. We all have that right, the right to choose the person you will love. They say there are plenty of fish in the sea, and men know how to fish and that they actually have the freedom to choose who to fish. In the same way, women should be afforded such right.
However, in saying no, you do not say it the first time you meet. Give every person the “benefit of the doubt”. Even an accused is given a chance to prove his innocence. And to make it a bit more legally dramatic, every person is presumed honest or in good faith until a clear and convincing contrary is proved. You might realize that in the end, the person you disliked is after all, a blessing in disguise. So yes, go on a date, meet new people, widen your circle of friends and you might be surprised he is just around the corner.
And if in the process you found out that he cannot put up with your standards and something about him is turning you off, this is the right moment to say No, firmly and clearly. If he is persistent, repeat it a thousand times.
Here’s the good thing. Saying no to a romantic relationship is saying yes to friendship. Although I have to qualify on this, it may be the best friendship you’ll ever have or the worst you’d rather not have. If turning him down opened a better friendship, then it’s all well and good. The problem arises when surrounding circumstances dictate that there is impossibility of being friends and that you both choose to go your own way. I will tell you, you don’t owe anyone an explanation, even to him. You just know in your mind and in your heart that you wish them well in whatever dreams they achieve or whoever will they find to be their one true love.
However, if there’s one letter explaining yourself, what would you write?
Dear Unsuitable Suitor,
I am lucky to have someone like you to like me. And I sincerely thank you for that. But sorry, I have to say no.
This might be hurtful but I want to be honest with you, I have to tell you straight up and unsugarcoated. I’d rather be rude than be a liar.
Yes, I am amazed by your brassiness and persistence. You are a good man but maybe you’re not the right one. I don’t feel the chemistry going on, I can’t see fireworks and hearts floating around, and I can’t find Cupid striking me with his arrow- I don’t think it will work. It’s just that, maybe, you are someone else’s star. I believe you will be a better choice for someone else.
My status today grants me incapable of handling relationships. I’m no Pro, and I’m too busy for love.
But I love you for being a human, for being a friend, for being a brother. I cannot pledge something more than that.
Anyhow, I wish we could stay as friends. But if not, I still wish you all the best. I wish you real happiness.
Goodbye.
Go on fishing, the next one you catch maybe the right one.
@.@
Young, and Wild and Free... 